HEALTHY AT HOME - identity
How do you see yourself?
TRUTHS ABOUT IMAGE
Image is both the mirror I look into and the window I look out of.
I perceive everything else through my perception of myself.
Your perception is based on what you consider a reality for you.
You attract what you inwardly feel you deserve.
What you think about yourself has an extremely strong influence on how you live your life! (friendship, marriage, career, etc.)
SEEING YOURSELF WRONG:
causes you to accept temporary setbacks as permanent defeats
causes you to tolerate what you were made to dominate
You attract losers and give yourself to be manipulated
You put way too much of yourself into relationships with the wrong people
You have multiple relationships in short periods of time (friendship, dating, etc.)
The amount you put into a relationship determines how much it will hurt when it ends.
Affects your faith – because you won’t believe God for what you don’t think you deserve.
WHAT HAVE YOU ALLOWED TO DEVALUE YOU?
past experiences
someone’s opinion
someone you’re sleeping with (spouse or mate)
weight gain or hair loss
amount of children you have
bad credit or the lack of income
social status
sense of no purpose / lack of vision
your latest mess up (every man is worth more than the worst thing they’ve done)
DEALING WITH LOW SELF ESTEEM AND INSECURITY
Understand, you will never be all God has created you to be if you have an image contrary to Gen 1:26-27
Let us make human beings in our image, likeness, make them reflecting our nature…MSG
Nature/NATURAL = character, kind, personality, make-up, outlook, etc.
Because we were made in the image of God!
We must conform to His image. Conform = agree with
Many believers wrestle with low self-esteem and insecurity!!!
SIGNS OF LOW SELF ESTEEM
You push folk away and avoid situations
Operate out of fear of rejection (you take/allow too much mess)
Timid in their behavior with others
fearful of conflict with others
Avoids confrontation
hungry for the approval of others
poor problem solvers
Have had suicidal thoughts at one time or another.
struggles heavily with fear.
Fear of failure, success, people, anything uncomfortable, unknown, etc. (1 Tim 1:7)
can be an emotional wreck
try to become everything to fit in everywhere (chameleon)
anxious and nervous at times where others are normal.
easily depressed surrounding any life setbacks
compete/compare with others
have a tendency to use addictive behavior to medicate their pain or hurt.
Such as sex, food, smoking, workaholic, drugs, drinking, gambling, etc.
PROPER SELF IMAGE
HEALTHY ESTEEM
Romans 12:3 AMP
For by the grace [of God] given to me I say to everyone of you not to think more highly of himself [and of his importance and ability] than he ought to think; but to think so as to have sound judgment, as God has apportioned to each a degree of faith [and a purpose designed for service].
WHAT IS SELF ESTEEM
how much you value and like yourself, or your overall opinion of yourself.
how confident you feel in your ability to manage your worth.
- PEOPLE WITH SELF ESTEEM
worthy to be loved and to love others,
worthy to be cared for and to care for others,
worthy to be nurtured and to nurture others,
worthy to be touched and supported and to touch and support others,
worthy to be listened to and to listen to others,
worthy to be recognized and to recognize others,
worthy to be encouraged and to encourage others,
worthy to be reinforced as "good" people and to recognize others as "good" people.
Have a productive personality; they have achieved success to the best of their ability in school, work, and society.
Are capable of being creative, imaginative problem solvers; of being risk takers, optimistic in their approach to life and in the attainment of their personal goals.
Are leaders and are skillful in dealing with people.
They are neither too independent nor too dependent on others.
They have the ability to size up a relationship and adjust to the demands of the interaction.
Have a healthy self-concept. Their perception of themselves is in synchrony with the picture of themselves they project to others.
Are able to state clearly who they are, what their future potential is, and to what they are committed to in life.
They are able to declare what they deserve to receive in their lifetime.
Are able to accept the responsibility for and consequences of their actions.
They do not resort to shifting the blame or using others as scapegoats for actions that have resulted in a negative outcome.
Are unselfish. They have a legitimate concern for the welfare of others.
They are not self-centered or egotistical in their outlook on life.
They do not take on the responsibility for others in an over-responsible way.
They help others accept the responsibility for their own actions.
They are, however, always ready to help anyone who legitimately needs assistance or guidance.
Have healthy coping skills. They are able to handle the stresses in their lives in a productive way. They are able to put the problems, concerns, issues, and conflicts that come their way into perspective.
They are able to keep their lives in perspective without becoming too idealistic or too morose.
They are survivors in the healthiest sense of the word.
They have a good sense of humor and are able to keep a balance of work and fun in their lives.
Look to the future with excitement, a sense of adventure and optimism.
They recognize their potential for success and visualize their success in the future.
They have dreams, aspirations, and hopes for the future.
They are goal-oriented with a sense of balance in working toward their goals.
They know from where they have come, where they are now, and where they are going.